K

I’ll start this one with some background before getting into it. I went to college in West Virginia and most of the sports teams had “team houses” AKA party centrals. There was the football house which was known for the slip and slide, Cornhole, flip cup relay races. The cheerleaders house which was almost always pre-gaming before going out to Wiseguyz and the basketball house which was GACKME party house! We’d always bounce between the houses each week, a crazy blend of people that always got along and had an amazing time.

Fall time in West Virginia is almost all college students favorite time, it’s football season, bonfires, (in West Virginia it means couch burning) and yes parties galore! This one Sunday afternoon in late September our football team stomped on West Virginia Wesleyan, the post game party was at the football house. We all rushed home and showered, rallied and headed down the street to party! The house was packed and the keg stands were already happening, there was a huge bonfire in the backyard and the smell of West Virginia fall was perfect!

We all were outside by the bonfire, drinking, talking and smoking, one of the cheerleaders (we will call her “K”) was talking to me about where I’m from and what Florida was like. It was an innocent conversation at first but as the drinks kept coming we were sitting closer and closer, she was starting to ask about what it’s like to be with a girl and that she had never been curious until recently. I tend to gain liquid courage as I drink, I mean who doesn’t really? So my first response was honest and then she had asked more detailed questions and I said “it’d be easier to just show you.” I could see her cheeks blushing even with the glow of the fire reflecting off her face. We had plenty of alcohol and I took the chance, I placed my hand under her chin and pulled her into my kiss. We sat there kissing for a bit and I said “you know we can leave or just go upstairs.” She grabbed my hand and we walked inside and up the stair way, we went to the bathroom and I shut the door behind us. We stood there kissing for a second and I asked if she was sure about this. She shook her head yes and continued to kiss me, I picked her up, her legs wrapped around my waist, I pushed everything on the edge of the counter away and I placed her there, next to the sink with her back against the mirror. We were kissing and her dress was pushed up above her hips. I slid her thong to the side so I could push my fingers against her clit, she gripped my back and pulled on my shirt so hard it was choking me with the pressure against my throat.

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No hands

For those that have lived under a rock for quite some time now, there is a show that is called “The L Word.”  Well my ex Molly had never seen it before, she also had never been with a girl other than myself but that’s besides the point.

We spent a few nights binge watching and in one of the episodes, Shane and Carmen play the “too hot game”.  They begin kissing but neither one can touch the other with any hands, while watching this show all of my friends have always compared me to Shane in the aspect of a “horny teenage boy” despite the fact that I am a raging lesbian. HAHA I guess they could be the same thing.   Anyways, Molly and I decide to play the too hot game that one night.  We had started with my back to the bedroom door and as we kissed, I took a step closer to the bed.  She would run her tongue across my bottom lip and take an easy bite before kissing me again. Each step I felt my hands start to pull towards her but I resisted.  Our kisses were always amazing but these kisses, in that moment were untouchable and not just because it was he too hot game. We had moved right next to the bed after a minute or so of kissing, I stepped my left leg between her legs and leaned into her, the way her knee’s caught the side of the bed it caused her to fall backwards.  I used it to my advantage and placed my hands above her head in hopes it would give me an advantage of not giving in, it in fact did NOT.   I kept pulling my head back and barely touching lips, trying to tease her into grabbing my face for a kiss.  Molly wrapped her legs around me and pulled my hips closer to hers, I started moving my hands closer to her face and I knew I was going to lose.  Molly then bit my bottom lip and I instantly moved my right hand to behind her ear, I pulled her face up into mine and kissed her hard.  She pulled away for a split second and smirked a winning smile at me, I was happily the loser though.  We laid there kissing for a while and when I asked what she wanted her prize to be, she sat up, kissed my cheek and took off her pants.  Her winning prize was a winning prize to me, I leaned her back and wasted no time.  I kissed down her neck and left small bite marks tracing down her collar bone, I pulled her tank top over her head as she undid her bra at the same time.

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Macy

Growing up in my family meant multiple vacations a year in Chokoloskee spent fishing with family and friends. I loved every vacation we had there.

This one year in particular we went with several of my parents friends and their families. I was freshly 21 years old, went through an extremely ugly break up and drinking all kinds of alcohol. My parents one friend Macy, was recently separated from her husband and we had gotten to talking just in general, we had several things in common. We made drinks and spent the first evening there making Jell-O shots for everyone so they could cool over night. We mixed the blue jello with vodka, the red with rum and the green with tequila. We had the place to our selves and were just talking more about our most recent heartbreaks while we took turns passing the left over liquor bottles back and forth taking shots out of each. I came up with the genius idea of playing “Never have I ever.”

Almost everyone knows about this game, it’s a fun way to learn “fun facts” about your friends. The questions vary from “never have I ever kissed a girl” to “never have I ever popped a Molly” to anything else you can think of that you haven’t done, that someone else playing has done. If anyone in the group HAS done it, then they’d have to drink. So now it’s just the two of us playing and obviously we are getting drunk extremely fast.

We were like two teenage girls giggling and leaning into each other on the couch. We had music playing and it was just genuinely a great memory. Macy and I ended up passing out that night on the couch, woke up the next morning around 6am to head out fishing for the day. We were all out on the water for hours that day, came back in for lunch and cooler refills. Before heading back out Macy came walking down the dock in these daisy duke shorts, the top button was undone so her bikini bottoms were peaking through, her tank top was in her hand and her gray bikini top with orange and gold designs was all I could see. I put the boat in neutral and told shouted for her to go out on the water with me this time! I was fishing on my own anyways, some company would be perfect. She hurried up, hopped on and we were off. A side note you need to understand is Choko is also called 10,000 islands. There are so many islands to get lost in and different fishing areas, finding privacy out there isn’t hard at all. So I get the boat on a plane and run south down to one of the fishing spots I know of. As I’m running, I kept glancing over and couldn’t help but to begin to notice how attractive Macy is. Yes she’s much older than I was but she had this short burgundy hair that fit her fave perfectly and when she wasn’t wearing her glasses, I could see these darker green specks in her eyes when the sun hit them at certain angles.

She was sitting next to me and was relatively close to me, but I was comfortable with her so it wasn’t a big deal.

We got to the fishing spot, I slowed the boat to a stop just off the islands ledge and oyster bar. I put the power pole down and rigged both rods up with popping corks while she made us both a drink. We did a “cheers” and cast our lines out, music playing and our conversation started back up from the previous night, talking and spending time with Macy was like hanging out with a long lost friend. I was comfortable, I was able to be myself and I was happy in the moment. After a couple hours of fishing we had gotten a couple keepers and decided to let the boat drift along the back of the islands and we laid out towels and relaxed, enjoying the sunset, music, drinks and salty air. Somehow the conversation turned into Macy questioning if she preferred women over men. I said “I’ve only been with girls that choose men, they tell me there’s a comfort level when they’re with me that they feel safe to explore their curiosity.” She sat half way up, there was a look of relief on her face. I asked what was wrong, she took a big swig from her cup looked at me and said “your parents can’t know this happens.”

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Amy Lynn

Alex was one of my buddies from high school, we didn’t really hang out until our second year of college.  That summer we were always at the hookah bar, the beach, concerts or one of our houses for drinks and house parties.  Well this one weekend in particular, his sister (who I didn’t even know he had) had moved home for a while.  Amy, was this short but super sexy curly haired blonde girl with the complete package of ass and boobs.

So we are all at this party and I go outside to say “Hi” to everyone; there she was, this girl…she was a stop what you’re doing, take you breath away and keep dreaming type of girl.  Of course, challenge accepted; I wanted her.  I didn’t even finish seeing my friends, I walked up to her and introduced myself.  She looked me up and down, smiled and said “Hi, I’m Amy Lynn.”  Her southern accent was one for the record books, literally I melted from just four words.  We spent the night hanging outback, laughing at all the “one liners” I apparently use without even noticing.  We decided even though it was the end of June in South Florida, we were starting a bonfire.  Everyone went inside saying we were drunk idiots but I grabbed two chairs and placed them by the fire pit for us, I sat down and she sat on my lap while completely ignoring the chair I got for her.    We were out there all night, ended up watching the sunrise while the fire dwindled away.  I asked if she’d like to go to breakfast and she kissed me on my lips and said “I’d rather go lay in bed with you.”  That’s just what we did, I grabbed the hose and made sure the rest of the fire was out.  She grabbed my hand and inside we went, everyone was passed out everywhere through out the house.  Literally there was one of our friends, Trey sleeping on the dining room table with a cushion from the chair as a pillow.  We quietly stepped over everyone and tip-toed into her room.  That morning we just laid there cuddling and kissing, I asked her to go to the concert with us the following weekend as my date.  She said “I’d love to” then kissed me and we fell asleep.

Fast forward to the next weekend, we had been spending the morning trying to get ready but every time she would walk by me we would end up making out and I’d start to undress her.  She’d giggle every time, push me back some and say “save it for later, I want you later.” I kept trying all day but she indeed made me wait until later.  We had a great time at the concert, had to have a few sneak away moments so no one would catch on.  A couple of my friends did catch on though and we explained to them that we didn’t want her brother Alex finding out just yet because we weren’t even sure what “we” were and if we were anything at all besides a good time.  They completely understood and promised to keep it hushed.  The concert came to an end and we all went back to Alex’s house.  Amy Lynn and I hadn’t gotten out of the car yet, we were kissing and knew Alex was inside, so we had to stay out in the car for a few minutes.  Those few minutes ended up leading to almost an hour, she had climbed over my center console, straddled me while we were kissing.

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Olivia

So there was this girl Olivia, she dated one of my friends from high school for a couple years. They ended up breaking up and about a year later we bumped in to each other at the mall, she looked like she could use a friend so I offered dinner and drinks. There were no ulterior motives behind my offer, I swear! We ended up going right then, headed over to a local sports bar and had several drinks, the more I drank; the more I was noticing how hot she actually was. I guess because she was dating my friend, I never really saw her in that way. It was hard to ignore now though, she had this luscious long blonde wavy hair, her body was toned all over, you could see her muscle cuts through her clothing for Christ sake! Her teeth lined up perfectly when she smiled too. Her eyes, they were this perfectly round and hazel-ish, green color. So as we were drinking, we were just bullshitting and talking about our past relationships and everything in general. She glanced at her phone and realized we had been here for several hours and it was almost 10pm. One of her friends had text her asking to go to a bar that’s open later, she invited me to tag along. I gladly said yes. We get to this bar and I had never been there before, we walk in and there’s bartenders making out with customers ON TOP of the bar! We sat at the other end of the bar order a round and out of nowhere I feel Olivia’s hand on my thigh. I looked over and she just flashed me a quick smile. Her friend showed up and we stayed there drinking for about another hour. I told them I was going to head out soon, they both agreed it was time for all of us to go anyways, we paid and I followed them out of the door. Olivia hugged her friend goodbye and as I was walking her to her car she was telling me how she didn’t want to go home just yet. I offered for her to come over to my house and hang out, she stopped walking, leaned into me and the second her lips touched mine I pushed her against her car and we stood there making out for a few mins before she pulled away to say “I’ll follow you to your house.” Continue reading “Olivia”

The one that got away

I thought I knew what heart break was, what infatuation was, what lust was, most importantly I thought I knew what love was. Little did I know you would change all of that, you would change my beliefs, you would change my life. When someone attractive enters into your sight your pupils dilate 20%. When someone falls in love their brain fills with dopamine, just like narcotics. You were my drug, 5 years clean when I met you and I became addicted without even having a hit. We met in the most random way as complete strangers, yet it felt like we knew each other forever. I became addicted to your name coming across my phone, whether it was Snapchat, instagram, Facebook or text. Knowing you were thinking of me to message me, it was what I relied on. The first time I met you in person my heart was beating out of my chest, I couldn’t take my eyes off of you, I was crazy about you right off the bat. I had never had such chemistry with someone like this. You were my wildest dreams come true, I knew in that moment that you were it for me. No one would ever compete, no one would ever hold a candle to you. Meeting you was a door that needed opened in my life, my heart and my soul. Falling for you was out of my own control and I honestly don’t regret any of it. You gave me the best year of memories, you gave me a year of love I thought I had lost forever, you gave me an entire year of happiness along with heartache but the good out weighed the bad by far. I didn’t think love existed any longer, I lost all care in being a hopeless romantic, gift giving and birthdays. I took a chance because the chance of everything working out and us having a happily ever after was the one thing I held on to. I just wanted a forever with you, I dreamt of a forever with you. I could’ve kept dreaming, hoping and praying but it doesn’t matter if only one of us had this dream and aspiration. I thought we were on the same page for the longest time, we even talked about a future and life together. Yet at the end of it all, we still didn’t end up together. My heart was crushed, sick to my stomach, the nauseous feeling overcame my entire body. I had no desire to be alive, when the alcohol wasn’t enough to forget you, to forget my heartbreak I even thought about using again just to forget. I needed, I still need my brain to rest, my memories to fade, my heart to stop hurting. You’re the one that got away, my forever “what if.” I’ll never know what we could’ve been, what we should’ve been. I still dream about it and if that’s all I will ever get to have, I’ll hold onto and cherish because you’re the best thing that’s never been mine. I love you forever and always. I can’t help but think that there’s someone for everyone.. except me.

Blonde Bombshell

I went to college in West Virginia, it’s where and when I really started to find myself. I had the truest freedom anyone could have asked for, new place, new faces; a brand new start. Even though I was 17 turning 18, I got to go clubbing, bar hopping, and being open completely with no reservations about my sexuality. Being on the basketball team had plenty of perks with only one con of that 5am practice time. Some of the perks were being able to go to the mountaineer mart (gas station) and get any beer I wanted, having a party every other night at either the basketball team house, cheerleaders house or football players house And we were treated like royalty up there! So back to the bombshell, one of these parties in particular was like a mixer for the different teams, the cheerleaders were coming in with their boyfriends on their arms and in walked this one blonde bombshell!! She had on this black spaghetti strap dress with a bulky cross necklace, her arm linked in with this guy who looked like a total douche. I couldn’t take my eyes off her all night, even a teammate told me “wishful thinking Florida!” I could care less at that point, I didn’t want any other girl, I wanted her. Her tight ripped arms and her smile… God her smile. The ways her green eyes scanned the room, the way her hair was perfectly still as she walked…the fact she was off limits made me want her more.

A few weeks had gone by and she was all I could think about, so when the chance to go to the cheerleaders house party arose, I jumped on it. We walked in and I couldn’t see her but I knew she was there, I don’t know how to explain it but my gut had butterflies as if she was standing right next to me. I went on to play beer pong on the back patio, we were laughing and having a great time until one of the guys literally launched himself across the table made out of a sheet of plywood, while screaming “Kobe!” At the top of his lungs. The cups spilt everywhere and table collapsed underneath him. The beer was everywhere and all over myself, I went to the restroom to try and clean up, as I opened the door I realized there was someone in there. I quickly went to shut it back until I heard someone crying in there, I poked my head around the doorway and asked if she was okay.. she mumbled something I couldn’t understand so I went in and saw it was her, the blonde bombshell, makeup a mess and she herself was just a crying mess. I stepped all the way into the restroom, shut the door behind me and knelt down beside her, I pushed her hair out of her face and lifted her chin up to see my face. I asked what was wrong and if I could fix whatever it was. She cried into my shoulder and said “I’m single for the first time in forever, I should be happy but I don’t know why I’m crying.” I wiped her tears and told her It’s more of a reason to go to Wise Guys with everyone and enjoy yourself despite whatever is going on! Be happy for yourself, you’re too gorgeous to cry.

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At that point we were all too Intoxicated to drive so we walked, it was only about half a mile away so it wasn’t too bad. We all walked up together, laughing and joking.. as we walked In to Wise Guys, we immediately went up stairs, grabbed a drink at the bar and hit the dance floor (which had a strippers pole to the left.) Now you should know I don’t really dance but apparently ALL of the cheerleaders do. My blonde bombshell was by my side the entire time and it took a while but convinced me to get on the pole with her. She grabbed my hand and I couldn’t even think straight, I followed her just so she wouldn’t let go. She started to dance and twirl around me when she stopped dead in her tracks, she spun around and said she had to go. I followed her out of the bar area, down the stairs and out of the front door. She was crying again, I caught up to her pretty quickly in the parking lot and grabbed her arm. She hugged me and was crying that he (the douche bag) was there with his ex before her. I said “fuck him, fuck her, we don’t need this place. Let’s go back and have our own party.” As we got back to the cheerleaders house, she realized she never brought a key. We checked all windows and doors but no luck, we ended up walking around the block to the basketball team house. We were all terrible at locking the door honestly, it was unlocked when we got there and no one was home. The music was still playing, so we made drinks and sat down on the couch while she calmed down a bit more. I kept telling her how beautiful she was, that it’s definitely his loss and how much more she deserved than someone who treated her like nothing and wasn’t hurt by her crying.

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